The Making Of A Dildo
I thought this was interesting so I figured I'd post this. Hey maybe
after this you'll want to get your own dick made. Lol.
E Pimpin' Blog
Brian Mcknight Gay??
 From The Jasmine Salon in Alphabet City this is Media Blake Out!!Ladiess, let's give it up for the Don of the Down Low, Blake Out! Blake Out: Sup Y'alllll?? This is Blake Out giving you the hottest gossip on who's in and who is OUT baby!! Yes Star Jones, your man will be talked about. Hollywood is gay and you need to know about it honey. Now, in an effort to "reach out", i'm going shake things up and invite a co-panelist. He's from California and he's a blogger on A Hot Mess, he's straight believe me i've tried. Ladies, give it up for some trife brotha named Justin. *the crowd claps and some people boo* Justin: You know what it is. Sup Blake? Blake: MMmhmmm. Justin: Ayo, what's up with that? I didn't come here for attitude. Yo, is it safe to have this many people in a tiny hair shop? It looks like a storage crate coming from Cuba up in here. Blake: YOU 5-0 NIGGA? *pulls out a pink pistol* I ALREADY PAID OFF THE INSPECTOR! YOU NEED TO BOUNCE! Justin: Naw man damn! But your check did bounce. I'm gonna need to hit up that register on the way out. Real talk. Blake: Whateva, i'm gonna register this pistol up your ass. Anyway, lets talk about the latest everyone. You know you've gotta watch out for those R & B crooners y'all. But he never crossed my mind as a brotha playing for my team. YEAH RIGHT! Let's hit the footage to see who I'M talking about. Blake: There you have it! The newest member of the DL Army, BRIAN MCKNIGHT!!! Justin: Uh, dog. He was just standing next to dude. That doesn't mean he's pushin his pudding. Damn. Blake: Don't you see the LOVE in their eyes! Can't you see how crazy in love these two are? I bet they went to their place and cuddled up with each other while watching Party of Five. Justin: No, no not really. I think you're having a moment. Party of Five? Christ. Blake: If you are gay Mistah McKnight, you picked a damn good time to turn the tide because i am single, chocolate and ready to melt. Give a brotha a call when you're ready for some dessert. Justin: Wow. Moving on. Lance Bass just broke up with his long time lover. After being in the closet so long, it must be hard to lose someone like that right after you just outed yourself. Blake: *snoores* Who CARES?! They're gay! We get it! Move on! Justin: This is news, not guesstimates. Blake: OOO WEE DON'T MAKE ME SLAP YOU! Next up, we have that tall handsome baller Cuttino Mobley. Apparently some pictures have come out and now what he is "cutting" is in question.  Blake: Look at that scarf? He looks like one of those gay thugs on the Wire trapped in Aspen. Justin: Just because homeboy makes bad choices in fashion doesn't exactly make him gay. Blake: WILL YOU SHUT UP!? Justin: You don't pay me to shut up. Blake: Well at least agree with the fact that his little buddy is gay. Justin: Oh, no doubt. Dude is flamin. That Ne-Yo skull cap says it all.  Blake: Finally, I'm reaching back for this one. I'm gonna have to break out the Alize after this one because it's a DOUBLE OUT! This down low ninja has both a penchant for penis and a taste of the HIV. I hope y'all are sitting down for this one. The man is none other than... Justin: OH HELL NAW! I can't even begin to co-sign this rumor. Didn't Darius play some sanitation dude in a TBN movie? Blake: Now he's going to be playing a Santation dude in a Bravo movie...OKAYYYY? Apparently he got the virus from going to a down low party. He was put on blast from a blind item. But we all know it was him. Justin: How? Were you at the party? Blake: No, but i have a credible source who can identify his penis out of a lineup Justin: I don't even want to be in the police station when that happens. Blake: *singing* When dayyyys goooo byyyyy It's a Different love on the DOWWWNNNN LOWW! Justin: Somebody pay me, i've had enough of this. Blake: Next up, Nas and Jay, what's REALLY going on? Justin: Oh hell, show's over. *screen goes black* (The preceeding was a satire of how Mediatakeout portrays homosexual men. Or men that aren't gay that are just feminine. Or men who just aren't gay at all. As bloggers we need to pick and choose our outings and not just fire at will. With that being said i'm pretty sure that Tyler Perry is gay. Real talk.) |
Head Skillz
Shia LaBeouf from “Transformers” and the upcoming “Eagle Eye” was recently spotted eating a banana and some salad.
Hmm ... I wonder if he's practicing his HEAD SKILLZ. I think he can take a fat 9". What yall think?
Spit Or Swallow
I die a million deaths every time I witness this woman speak her peace. This is titled, “Spit or Swallow,” from Killer Mike featuring Vagina Power Alexyss Tylor and her mother.
I die a million deaths every time I witness this woman speak her peace.This is titled, "Spit or Swallow," from Killer Mike featuring Vagina Power Alexyss Tylor and her mother.
Tyra Yells At Britney Spears
Wow, This video is hilarious. I?ve been having the darnest time working my way to computers. But, this clip made it all the merrier. I love it!!
The Gays Love Britney's New Single!
Leave the antibiotics at home, because Britney's latest burning sensation is her new song!
At several gay clubs in West Hollywood this weekend, patrons cheered when "Gimme More" blasted through the room. Homosexuals loves me, y'all! Sources inside WeHo hotspots Fubar, Here Lounge, and Eleven tell TMZ that on top of the overwhelmingly enthusiastic crowd reaction, the dance track is currently one of their most requested songs. At least there's some loyal men in her life!
If Sundays VMA performance turns out to be the final chipped nail in Britney's career coffin, she can always play the Gay Pride circuit alongside Toni Basil, Katrina and the Waves, and Tiffany! Ding dang!
Britney's MTV's Video Music Awards video clip.
Thursday, August 5, 2007
Sermon on the Mount by Elisabeth Ohlson Wallin
Click for the Jesus as Gay music video
Art that shows Jesus as gay has sparked violence—most recently in Sweden last week.
The controversial images also appear in my new book Art That Dares: Gay Jesus, Woman Christ, and More. It has color images by 11 artists from the US and Europe, including Swedish photographer Elisabeth Ohlson Wallin.
A group of young people tried to set fire to a poster at the cultural center that was exhibiting her photos of a queer Christ. Staff intervened and as many as 30 people joined the fight, according to news reports.
The recent melee broke out over her Ecce Homo series, which recreates scenes from Christ’s life in a contemporary lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) context. The conflict occurred in the Swedish city of Jonkoping, known as a center of evangelical Christianity.
The violence in Sweden is the latest example of why the queer Christ is needed. Jesus taught love, but now Christian rhetoric is being used to justify hate and discrimination LGBT people.
People try to censor or destroy queer Christ images, so I compiled them into a book to ensure that they would be available.
Ohlson Wallin’s Ecce Homo series has caused violence before. It toured Europe widely from 1998-2000, winning awards and breaking attendance records. More than 250,000 people viewed it, but a man with an ax destroyed two of the photos and Ohlson Wallin needed police protection after receiving death threats. The Pope cancelled a planned audience with the Swedish archbishop because Ecce Homo was shown at Uppsala’s National Cathedral.
Ohlson Wallin created Ecce Homo in the late 1990s after losing many friends to AIDS. She got mad when some Christians said that the disease was God’s punishment for being gay. Grief and anger became the motivation for her powerful, transformative images.
“I wanted to show that love is for everyone,” told me.
I believe that Christ represents everybody, including sexual outcasts. Two thousand years ago Jesus taught love and justice and was killed for it. One of the charges that led to his crucifixion was blasphemy—the same charge that is being leveled against me and the artists in my book.
My experiences have shown me that many people are longing for progressive spiritual images. They seek alternatives to the current conservative monopoly on Christian imagery.
Today queer people of faith are reclaiming our power and creating new images of the divine based on our own experiences. I am grateful to the artists who are pioneers on this sacred path.
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Epimping serves you about a lifetime of dating tips in one easy to follow 15 point plan
Thug Porn Blog Note: If only the Pentagon was this organized!
Thug Porn Blog Note: If only the Pentagon was this organized!
1. MR. THUG LIFE
Advantages
a. Real good at making love
b. Fun and exciting
c. Makes you laugh
d. Has your back, will fight and protect you
DisAdvantages
a. Usually drinks and smokes too much
b. Always got drama
c. Stays a thug forever
d. In and out of jail
2. MR. DL
Advantages
a. Will take you out in the beginning
b. Compliments you all the time
c. Fucks you so good, you fall in love with his ass
DisAdvantages
a. Doesn't introduce you to his friends or family
b. Has a girlfriend who he`s been with since the 2nd grade
c. Will not get rid of her
d. He tells you about her after you`ve fallen in love with his ass
3. MR. BIG BALLA
Advantages
a. Will give you money with no questions asked
b. Has alot of style to him
c. Will show you some of the nice things in life
DisAdvantages
a. Never returns your txts
b. Feels he can come to your house at any given time without calling first
c. Loves to be around his boys more than you.
4. MR. I`M IN THE INDUSTRY
Advantages
a. Can get you and your friends on the guest list at all the jumpin parties
b. Can have a decent stimulating conversation
c. Tends to dress nice
DisAdvantages
a. Seems flighty when you speak of a solid commitment
b. You still have to wait in line to get in all the jumpin parties, then there`s drama at the door
c. All he has is a bunch of pictures with celebrities but he doesn`t know any of them personally
5. MR. INTELLECTUAL
Advantages
a. Book smart
b. Cares about how you feel
c. Has a very good job
DisAdvantages
a. Boring as hell
b. Doesn`t know what the hell he`s doin in bed
c. He is not street smart
d. Always asking you when can he see you again
6. MR. GHETTO
Advantages
a. THE BOMB IN BED!!!!!
b. Makes you laugh
c. Got mad style and flava
d. Has a temper, but generally a charming sweet guy
e. Says he want a real relationship
DisAdvantages
a. He got 3 or more baby momma's
b. Wants to lay up in your crib, use your phone, and eat up all your food
c. Is in denial when you tell him about himself
d. Comes home at 3:00 am and says he was out with his boys
e. Atlhough he wants a "real" relationship, he still wants to fuck around
7. MR. I`M A RIGHTEOUS BLACK MAN
Advantages
a. Will teach you about black history
b. Revolutionary
c. Inspiring & gives to you spiritually & emotionally
DisAdvantages
a. Breaks up with you for a white boy
b. Mo money-doesn`t have a job
c.Doesn`t own a nice suit, always wearing camouflage and sweats
d. In the end, you find out he is just a trifling, con mothafucka
8. MR. TOO DAMN GOOD
Advantages
a. Will introduce you to his mother
b. Has a job and will take you out
c. Will give you money for your bills if you need it
d. Sometimes he goes to church on Sunday
DisAdvantages
a. Sometimes he goes to church on Sunday
b. Secretly wants to be Mr. Thug Life
c. Wears fake Movado &Rolex watches when he goes to the club
d. Ignores you when the game is on because he takes sports too serious-He didn`t make it professionally
e.You find out after you break up with him that he was cheating on you
9. MR. PLAYA
Advantages
a. Will tell you the truth - that you`re not the only one
b. Sometimes he`s fairly decent in bed
c. He tells you that you`ve changed him and he`s ready to settle down
d. Has his own apartment and car (invites you to move in with him)
DisAdvantages
a. He doesn`t acknowledge you in public
b. Generally he is a punk (won`t stand up for anything)
c. He expects you to believe all his lies just because he told you the truth about there being others
d. After you catch his lyin` ass, he tells you that he told you that he was a playa in the beginning anyway
10. MR. I HAVE A JOB
Advantages
a. Of course.... he has a job
b. Doesn`t have too many bad habits
c. Will take care of you when you`re sick
d. Tells you that he is in love with you
DisAdvantages
a. You stay in the relationship 2 years or more and then find out he`s a shiftless, lazy son-of-a-bitch who wants you to do all the wifely duties but won`t give you a "ring".
b. He ends up telling you that he loves you, but is not "in love" with you
c. After he leaves you he gets married a month later
11. MR. BEST FRIEND
Advantages
a. He`s your best friend, you tell each other everything; you get along very, very well
b. He gives you advice when you and your man are having problems
c. The ultimate gentleman
d. Sweet and caring with a good sense of humor
DisAdvantages
a. You end up hooking up with him only to find he ain`t about shit either!
b. Now, you gotta find a new best friend because you can`t stand his ass no more
12. MR. EYE CANDY
Advantages
a. ONE SEXY MOTHERFUKER!
b. Knows how to put it DOWN in bed
c. Will believe anything you tell him
DisAdvantages
a. Dumb as a box of rocks
b. Gets through life with his bronze Adonis good looks
c. Will believe everything you you tell him
c. Jealous bitches WILL try to take him, but after a while you might stop caring
13. MR. SUGA-DADDY
Advantages
a. Although he's older, he still has a nice body
b. REALLY wants to have a steady relationship
c. Spoils you mad, and takes you all over the world
d. If you haven't moved in with him, he pays your rent and all your bills
e. If he's REALLY old, he'll leaves you his estate if you manage to keep having sex with him
DisAdvantages
a. Even if he does still have his football body, the sex is AIGHT. You should probably forget about having another orgasm
b. So your in a relation ship, but he NEVER wants to spend time with HIS friends, just you
c. Your still young, but he never wants to go clubbing
d. He has kids from before he realized he was gay. (Which could be an advantage if you like kids.)
e. Your tired of sleeping with this old ass man, so your planning on how you can kill him and live happily ever after with the pool boy. Most likely your going to hell, but at least your rich.
14. MR. PORN STAR
Advantages
a. Has a HUGE dick!
b. You'll question if you'll ever find better sex
c. Sexy as hell
d. No, really HAVE YOU SEEN HOW BIG HIS DICK IS?!?
DisAdvantages
a. Always fucking other niggas (lol)
b. Addicted to sex. So if you (for some reason) won't give it to him, he'll get it elsewhere, or will forever be on your couch watchin fliks and jacking off
c. EVERYBODY wants to sleep with your man
d. Started stripping in college to help pay his tuition then he got "discovered" and is now doing porn and has yet recieved a Bachelors degree and he's now 25
e. Dumb as a box a rocks b/c he dropped out of college
f. His dick is so good, it'll have your ass calling out of work, and has your friends and family filing missing persons reports b/c you haven't left the house in days and no one has seen or heard from you
g. Your lights get cut off b/c you havn't been to work in weeks so the bill wasn't paid
h. His "career" can be over at any minute, I mean he is pushing 26......
i. He turns 26 and his career is over. He's got no job and no education and expects your ass to take care of him
15. MR. RIGHT
Advantages
a. He loves God and takes his relationship with God seriously
b. He is intellectual, brilliant, and capable of taking care of you mentally and emotionally
c. He will love you even when you are not lovable
d. He has a career and not a job!
e. He acknowledges his faults and strives to be a better man
f. He understands a relationship is built on a 200% quota - 100% him and 100% you
g. He doesn`t have a bunch of kids and babies mommas - he`s smarter than that.
h. He is a true best friend and everything you ever wanted in a man
i. He was cute when you met him. But, after spending sometime you see he`s fine as hell!
j. He can dress - knows the difference b/t formal, semi-formal, professional, business casual, casual, and since we are just chilling let me throw on some sweats and a fitted hat
h. He loves his mother and respects women
DisAdvantages
a. You`ve never met him and if you did he's STRAIGHT
Kelly Rowland
Beyonce Flaws & All
The G-Star Glory Hole.
At this prime billboard location on the corner of Houston and Lafayette, the executions come and go quickly.
But that one apartment window (on the right) is always left uncovered.
Dis time, da opening has left our otherwise trapped male model with—if he boosts himself up on the ledge— a glory hole!!
Peeping da shape and relative size of dis glory hole, his G-Star outfit ain't the only thing that's going to be RAW.
Wow, downtown really is getting cleaner. That is the neatest, graffiti-free-est glory hole in the world.
Um, at least I THINK it is.
But he'd better use it, 'cause it looks like the bitch just stiff-armed his stiffy (note the purposeful vulgarity!).
Is T-Pain Gay or Bisexual? Well they say the proof is in the pudding
and in this case he is talking an awful lot about Ray-J's penis size.
Watch and listen for yourself.
Click here for Keeping It Real Video
I used to find Svedka's ad campaign intriguing, but we've grown a bit tired of their Isaac Asimov inspired gender bending.
I've recently learned that Svedka's ad campaign marketed toward gays, straights and lesbians, but the model remains the same: that seemingly blissful female robot. Now that synthetic bitch's aiming for a new social group, the so-called "homometrosexual". Hmm now what could that mean?? NEWAYZ, Svedka - is da official liquor sponsor of New York City's gay pride. They'll be boozing the boys up, getting down with the dykes - you know how it do. But I heard they ain't got no go-go boys for dey float, should I loan them some =)
She does have nice breasts. But why should homometrosexuals be attracted to nice breasts? The plot thickens.
Rihanna & Ne-Yo do an amazing job together.
This track is titled, "Hate That I Love You." This track is going to be HUGE! That boy, Ne-Yo has sick penmanship.
I can't get enough of his work. Tell me whatcha think?
Listen: Rihanna feat. Ne-Yo - Hate That I Love You
Yo I've always been a huge fan of JOE BUDDENS. Joey has the sickest punchlines in the game. His delivery is ridiculous. Anyway, this new joint features Redman. You've got two of my favorite rappers on a track wilding outunbelievably out of control! Their vibe is unstoppable the energy is sick. I think you all will love this joint. JERSSSSSSEY STAND UP!!!
Listen: Joe Buddens feat. Redman - New Jersey Drive
Roseannne Clarifies Her "Read" on Gay People
Apologizes Profusely, Calls for Action
Ms. Rosanne ain't neva been shy of controversy. But, unlike so many controversial characters who dont keep it real, she ain't neva been fraid to admit when she's wrong. Dis 54-year old actress fucked up yesterday when she called gays "narcissists" who don't care about other people's political well-being. END RESULT, her bad choice of words became a "READ" now Ms. Barr's issued an apology to clear the air. She writes on her website:
I deeply regret that I have offended gay people. I said things that I do not really mean, before I had thought them through... I was wrong and I seriously apologize!
Then the bitch further explained her remarks, saying that gay people need to align with other oppressed groups. The gay icon went on to blast gay Republicans and urged everyone to fight for financial equality:
I have met too many gays who are Republicans, and I cannot understand how they could choose that!
Let's all leave our own bedrooms, kitchens, neighborhoods and groups and meet each other to form a diverse army that stands for Democracy and Economic Justice!
Okay Rosanne, We'll join da army, but only if da uniforms flatter our asses. Oh shit, wait, does that make us narcissists?
Hit me back with yall commentz!! Dis E. Pimpin
Unicorn Planet: Proof There Is A God
And That Gay People Rule!
Whattup yall , I aint neva seen nuffin so fuckin fagalicious as Unicorn Planet. Words can't describe, so Ima let yall watch this fukin shyt. All yall need to know is dat: in the year 2117 an eight year old gay boy named Shannon found a magic lamp. He got the standard three wishes and used one of them too establish the aforementioned Unicorn Planet.
I was in L.A. today in West Hollywood (where else) and while i was waiting for the bus I noticed an advertisement on the bus stop. I was like Holy Shit! I laughed my ass off looks like to me BMW has found a new advertising niche. Often times overzealous advertisers simply stick a rainbow flag on something and expect it to fly with the gays. Othertimes, as in this BMW advert, they hit the nail on the head.
Also, for you autophiles, NY Times has an article about gay cars in which journo Alex Williams takes a closer look at such marketing tactics, such as Subaru's "It's not a choice. It's the way we're built". Clever, yes, but we still prefer the BMW ad. Now, if only we could afford one...
Dis ya boy E pimpin signin out!!
Advantages
a. Real good at making love
b. Fun and exciting
c. Makes you laugh
d. Has your back, will fight and protect you
DisAdvantages
a. Usually drinks and smokes too much
b. Always got drama
c. Stays a thug forever
d. In and out of jail
2. MR. DL
Advantages
a. Will take you out in the beginning
b. Compliments you all the time
c. Fucks you so good, you fall in love with his ass
DisAdvantages
a. Doesn't introduce you to his friends or family
b. Has a girlfriend who he`s been with since the 2nd grade
c. Will not get rid of her
d. He tells you about her after you`ve fallen in love with his ass
3. MR. BIG BALLA
Advantages
a. Will give you money with no questions asked
b. Has alot of style to him
c. Will show you some of the nice things in life
DisAdvantages
a. Never returns your txts
b. Feels he can come to your house at any given time without calling first
c. Loves to be around his boys more than you.
4. MR. I`M IN THE INDUSTRY
Advantages
a. Can get you and your friends on the guest list at all the jumpin parties
b. Can have a decent stimulating conversation
c. Tends to dress nice
DisAdvantages
a. Seems flighty when you speak of a solid commitment
b. You still have to wait in line to get in all the jumpin parties, then there`s drama at the door
c. All he has is a bunch of pictures with celebrities but he doesn`t know any of them personally
5. MR. INTELLECTUAL
Advantages
a. Book smart
b. Cares about how you feel
c. Has a very good job
DisAdvantages
a. Boring as hell
b. Doesn`t know what the hell he`s doin in bed
c. He is not street smart
d. Always asking you when can he see you again
6. MR. GHETTO
Advantages
a. THE BOMB IN BED!!!!!
b. Makes you laugh
c. Got mad style and flava
d. Has a temper, but generally a charming sweet guy
e. Says he want a real relationship
DisAdvantages
a. He got 3 or more baby momma's
b. Wants to lay up in your crib, use your phone, and eat up all your food
c. Is in denial when you tell him about himself
d. Comes home at 3:00 am and says he was out with his boys
e. Atlhough he wants a "real" relationship, he still wants to fuck around
7. MR. I`M A RIGHTEOUS BLACK MAN
Advantages
a. Will teach you about black history
b. Revolutionary
c. Inspiring & gives to you spiritually & emotionally
DisAdvantages
a. Breaks up with you for a white boy
b. Mo money-doesn`t have a job
c.Doesn`t own a nice suit, always wearing camouflage and sweats
d. In the end, you find out he is just a trifling, con mothafucka
8. MR. TOO DAMN GOOD
Advantages
a. Will introduce you to his mother
b. Has a job and will take you out
c. Will give you money for your bills if you need it
d. Sometimes he goes to church on Sunday
DisAdvantages
a. Sometimes he goes to church on Sunday
b. Secretly wants to be Mr. Thug Life
c. Wears fake Movado &Rolex watches when he goes to the club
d. Ignores you when the game is on because he takes sports too serious-He didn`t make it professionally
e.You find out after you break up with him that he was cheating on you
9. MR. PLAYA
Advantages
a. Will tell you the truth - that you`re not the only one
b. Sometimes he`s fairly decent in bed
c. He tells you that you`ve changed him and he`s ready to settle down
d. Has his own apartment and car (invites you to move in with him)
DisAdvantages
a. He doesn`t acknowledge you in public
b. Generally he is a punk (won`t stand up for anything)
c. He expects you to believe all his lies just because he told you the truth about there being others
d. After you catch his lyin` ass, he tells you that he told you that he was a playa in the beginning anyway
10. MR. I HAVE A JOB
Advantages
a. Of course.... he has a job
b. Doesn`t have too many bad habits
c. Will take care of you when you`re sick
d. Tells you that he is in love with you
DisAdvantages
a. You stay in the relationship 2 years or more and then find out he`s a shiftless, lazy son-of-a-bitch who wants you to do all the wifely duties but won`t give you a "ring".
b. He ends up telling you that he loves you, but is not "in love" with you
c. After he leaves you he gets married a month later
11. MR. BEST FRIEND
Advantages
a. He`s your best friend, you tell each other everything; you get along very, very well
b. He gives you advice when you and your man are having problems
c. The ultimate gentleman
d. Sweet and caring with a good sense of humor
DisAdvantages
a. You end up hooking up with him only to find he ain`t about shit either!
b. Now, you gotta find a new best friend because you can`t stand his ass no more
12. MR. EYE CANDY
Advantages
a. ONE SEXY MOTHERFUKER!
b. Knows how to put it DOWN in bed
c. Will believe anything you tell him
DisAdvantages
a. Dumb as a box of rocks
b. Gets through life with his bronze Adonis good looks
c. Will believe everything you you tell him
c. Jealous bitches WILL try to take him, but after a while you might stop caring
13. MR. SUGA-DADDY
Advantages
a. Although he's older, he still has a nice body
b. REALLY wants to have a steady relationship
c. Spoils you mad, and takes you all over the world
d. If you haven't moved in with him, he pays your rent and all your bills
e. If he's REALLY old, he'll leaves you his estate if you manage to keep having sex with him
DisAdvantages
a. Even if he does still have his football body, the sex is AIGHT. You should probably forget about having another orgasm
b. So your in a relation ship, but he NEVER wants to spend time with HIS friends, just you
c. Your still young, but he never wants to go clubbing
d. He has kids from before he realized he was gay. (Which could be an advantage if you like kids.)
e. Your tired of sleeping with this old ass man, so your planning on how you can kill him and live happily ever after with the pool boy. Most likely your going to hell, but at least your rich.
14. MR. PORN STAR
Advantages
a. Has a HUGE dick!
b. You'll question if you'll ever find better sex
c. Sexy as hell
d. No, really HAVE YOU SEEN HOW BIG HIS DICK IS?!?
DisAdvantages
a. Always fucking other niggas (lol)
b. Addicted to sex. So if you (for some reason) won't give it to him, he'll get it elsewhere, or will forever be on your couch watchin fliks and jacking off
c. EVERYBODY wants to sleep with your man
d. Started stripping in college to help pay his tuition then he got "discovered" and is now doing porn and has yet recieved a Bachelors degree and he's now 25
e. Dumb as a box a rocks b/c he dropped out of college
f. His dick is so good, it'll have your ass calling out of work, and has your friends and family filing missing persons reports b/c you haven't left the house in days and no one has seen or heard from you
g. Your lights get cut off b/c you havn't been to work in weeks so the bill wasn't paid
h. His "career" can be over at any minute, I mean he is pushing 26......
i. He turns 26 and his career is over. He's got no job and no education and expects your ass to take care of him
15. MR. RIGHT
Advantages
a. He loves God and takes his relationship with God seriously
b. He is intellectual, brilliant, and capable of taking care of you mentally and emotionally
c. He will love you even when you are not lovable
d. He has a career and not a job!
e. He acknowledges his faults and strives to be a better man
f. He understands a relationship is built on a 200% quota - 100% him and 100% you
g. He doesn`t have a bunch of kids and babies mommas - he`s smarter than that.
h. He is a true best friend and everything you ever wanted in a man
i. He was cute when you met him. But, after spending sometime you see he`s fine as hell!
j. He can dress - knows the difference b/t formal, semi-formal, professional, business casual, casual, and since we are just chilling let me throw on some sweats and a fitted hat
h. He loves his mother and respects women
DisAdvantages
a. You`ve never met him and if you did he's STRAIGHT
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Kelly Rowland
A few days ago in a Kelly Rowland update i told she performed at the London club G-A-Y and posted some pictures. The great thing now is that the videos of Kelly's performances have leaked on the net. Just click on the titles below to watch them:
WATCH THE LIVE PERFORMANCES
Kelly Rowland Performs Ghetto
Kelly Rowland - Say My Name (Live @ G-A-Y)
Miss Kelly performing Can't Nobody at G-A-Y
Kelly Rowland - This Love (LIVE @ G-A-Y)
Kelly Rowland - Bootilicious (LIVE @ G-A-Y)
Kelly Rowland - Flashback (acapella)
WATCH THE LIVE PERFORMANCES
Kelly Rowland Performs Ghetto
Kelly Rowland - Say My Name (Live @ G-A-Y)
Miss Kelly performing Can't Nobody at G-A-Y
Kelly Rowland - This Love (LIVE @ G-A-Y)
Kelly Rowland - Bootilicious (LIVE @ G-A-Y)
Kelly Rowland - Flashback (acapella)
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
Beyonce Flaws & All
Tuesday, June 5, 2007
The G-Star Glory Hole.
At this prime billboard location on the corner of Houston and Lafayette, the executions come and go quickly.
But that one apartment window (on the right) is always left uncovered.
Dis time, da opening has left our otherwise trapped male model with—if he boosts himself up on the ledge— a glory hole!!
Peeping da shape and relative size of dis glory hole, his G-Star outfit ain't the only thing that's going to be RAW.
Wow, downtown really is getting cleaner. That is the neatest, graffiti-free-est glory hole in the world.
Um, at least I THINK it is.
But he'd better use it, 'cause it looks like the bitch just stiff-armed his stiffy (note the purposeful vulgarity!).
Monday, June 4, 2007
Is T-Pain Gay or Bisexual? Well they say the proof is in the pudding
and in this case he is talking an awful lot about Ray-J's penis size.
Watch and listen for yourself.
Sunday, June 3, 2007
Click here for Keeping It Real Video
Thursday, May 31, 2007
I used to find Svedka's ad campaign intriguing, but we've grown a bit tired of their Isaac Asimov inspired gender bending.
I've recently learned that Svedka's ad campaign marketed toward gays, straights and lesbians, but the model remains the same: that seemingly blissful female robot. Now that synthetic bitch's aiming for a new social group, the so-called "homometrosexual". Hmm now what could that mean?? NEWAYZ, Svedka - is da official liquor sponsor of New York City's gay pride. They'll be boozing the boys up, getting down with the dykes - you know how it do. But I heard they ain't got no go-go boys for dey float, should I loan them some =)
She does have nice breasts. But why should homometrosexuals be attracted to nice breasts? The plot thickens.
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Friday, May 11, 2007
Tuesday, May 7, 2007
One of the funniest things I have ever seen. Check it out I promise you will laugh your ass off.
Well ever wonder what happens to a white people when they listen to
too much rap? Lemme show you.
Playground Tales with Brooke Shields
Playground Tales with Brooke Shields
Wednesdayday, April 18, 2007
DIS YA BOY E. PIMPIN. WHATTTUP MY PEOPLEZ I WAS A LIL BORED SO I
MADE THIS CARTOON OF WHAT HAPPENED TO ME AT DA CLUB ONE NIGHT WHEN I
PASSED OUT.
Picked up this beauty from a crack head in my neighborhood, the penis
was already cut out so I decided to make it into a picture frame of
my friend John dancing. Then I figured two small holes to hold my
coat and hat wouldn't be any worse than a big one in the crotch. Then
I didnt know what to do with the penis except make him a unicorn.
What yall think??
Wait Did they just cut her forehead off? Bogus. She looks beautiful!
Classy. I'm going to go with the second one because, she did just cut her hair not that long ago.
Classy. I'm going to go with the second one because, she did just cut her hair not that long ago.
Sunday, April 15, 2007
Listen: Rihanna feat. Ne-Yo - Hate That I Love You
Yo I've always been a huge fan of JOE BUDDENS. Joey has the sickest punchlines in the game. His delivery is ridiculous. Anyway, this new joint features Redman. You've got two of my favorite rappers on a track wilding outunbelievably out of control! Their vibe is unstoppable the energy is sick. I think you all will love this joint. JERSSSSSSEY STAND UP!!!
Listen: Joe Buddens feat. Redman - New Jersey Drive
Well today i said that is finally it, my toilet broke again. I'm tired of this shit, no pun intended. I had to go into my savings and get me a new toilet bowel for my crib, It costed me $450.00
I didn't know that buying a toilet seat was an all night event. So many colors and sizes they come in. Did I want a regular one, or the one that squirts you in the ass? Hey what you laughing for, at least I aint gotta buy toilet paper. Yo but while I was walking through the isle I spotted it. Some thug type shit. I found tha toilet seat for my ass, Its called FISHNFLUSH. This some thug type shit,I love fish and hey instead of flushing them down the toilet I can put them in the toilet. Dis special aquarium wraps around a clear inner toilet tank. It makes a fanciful and bold bathroom statement, but be warned: it is not for the pee-shy.
I didn't know that buying a toilet seat was an all night event. So many colors and sizes they come in. Did I want a regular one, or the one that squirts you in the ass? Hey what you laughing for, at least I aint gotta buy toilet paper. Yo but while I was walking through the isle I spotted it. Some thug type shit. I found tha toilet seat for my ass, Its called FISHNFLUSH. This some thug type shit,I love fish and hey instead of flushing them down the toilet I can put them in the toilet. Dis special aquarium wraps around a clear inner toilet tank. It makes a fanciful and bold bathroom statement, but be warned: it is not for the pee-shy.
Roseannne Clarifies Her "Read" on Gay People
Apologizes Profusely, Calls for Action
Ms. Rosanne ain't neva been shy of controversy. But, unlike so many controversial characters who dont keep it real, she ain't neva been fraid to admit when she's wrong. Dis 54-year old actress fucked up yesterday when she called gays "narcissists" who don't care about other people's political well-being. END RESULT, her bad choice of words became a "READ" now Ms. Barr's issued an apology to clear the air. She writes on her website:
I deeply regret that I have offended gay people. I said things that I do not really mean, before I had thought them through... I was wrong and I seriously apologize!
Then the bitch further explained her remarks, saying that gay people need to align with other oppressed groups. The gay icon went on to blast gay Republicans and urged everyone to fight for financial equality:
I have met too many gays who are Republicans, and I cannot understand how they could choose that!
Let's all leave our own bedrooms, kitchens, neighborhoods and groups and meet each other to form a diverse army that stands for Democracy and Economic Justice!
Okay Rosanne, We'll join da army, but only if da uniforms flatter our asses. Oh shit, wait, does that make us narcissists?
Hit me back with yall commentz!! Dis E. Pimpin
Unicorn Planet: Proof There Is A God
And That Gay People Rule!
Whattup yall , I aint neva seen nuffin so fuckin fagalicious as Unicorn Planet. Words can't describe, so Ima let yall watch this fukin shyt. All yall need to know is dat: in the year 2117 an eight year old gay boy named Shannon found a magic lamp. He got the standard three wishes and used one of them too establish the aforementioned Unicorn Planet.
I was in L.A. today in West Hollywood (where else) and while i was waiting for the bus I noticed an advertisement on the bus stop. I was like Holy Shit! I laughed my ass off looks like to me BMW has found a new advertising niche. Often times overzealous advertisers simply stick a rainbow flag on something and expect it to fly with the gays. Othertimes, as in this BMW advert, they hit the nail on the head.
Also, for you autophiles, NY Times has an article about gay cars in which journo Alex Williams takes a closer look at such marketing tactics, such as Subaru's "It's not a choice. It's the way we're built". Clever, yes, but we still prefer the BMW ad. Now, if only we could afford one...
Dis ya boy E pimpin signin out!!